The answer, before anyone starts worrying about me, is yes. Normally when I pose that question to myself the answer is no or I’m not sure and that’s because I only ponder on the subject when I’m feeling low. These instances of feeling down are becoming fewer and fewer but it’s during these times that I contemplate how I’m feeling, which maginifies the moment and then I dwell on it.
When I’m feeling good or positive or happy I don’t question anything and just get on with things. This occurred to me in the car at the weekend. I was on the way back from B&Q and was feeling grumpy, because for about the third visit in a row they didn’t have what I needed and I started getting everything out of perspective. My brain went through my usual chain of negative thoughts – I’m fed up of having to do things to the house, I’m tired, my fingers hurt, blaa, blaa, blaa. Then the question came to the front of my mind “am I happy?”. This time the positive me managed to jump to the fore and stop myself answering straight away. I reminded myself that I had been saying the weekend before how much I had enjoyed having a whole weekend as a family. I reminded myself of how excited I was that the business moved into a new office last week. I reminded myself how funny and cute my little boy is and finally I reminded myself how lucky I was to live where I do with a lovely supportive husband. That’s when I made the resolution not to ask myself that question anymore.
I think it’s easy to dwell on the negative and let the positive things just wash over me. When I’m feeling down now I’m going to try and ask myself “what’s wrong?”. I suspect the answer most of the time will be nothing really, I’m just having a bad day and that’s fine and I just need to get on with it and know that I will snap out of it and start seeing the happy things again soon.